The 13th Floor

Man Live-Tweets His Horrifying Encounter With a “Spider Tornado”

On a business trip to teach disaster-response classes to emergency workers in Fort Myers, Florida, FEMA contractor Chris Tarantino (no relation) picked up a rental car — something he’d done many times before without incident.

But this Tuesday, Chris realized his emergency training was totally inadequate to deal with the horrors he was about to encounter in that vehicle.

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As reported in USA Today, the specialist re-entered the rented Dodge Charger after dinner, to discover that literally thousands of spiders had recently hatched inside it… and had swarmed over the front seat in what he described as a “spider tornado,” and hash-tagged it #spiderpocalypse2016.

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So how did he deal with the nightmare he suddenly found himself in? He live-tweeted it, of course!

Tarantino’s rationale for documenting the entire incident in real-time — over the course of nearly 50 tweets — was that it just came naturally to him.

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“This was just that level of ridiculousness to share,” he told USA Today. “I feel like I had to get it out there.”

Astoundingly, after going back into the restaurant to have a beer, he was able to muster up enough resolve to drive the car back to the rental agency, where they supplied a replacement vehicle — presumably with a no-spider guarantee.

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“I’m just glad they didn’t decide to hatch while I was driving, or else I’d be dead,” he said.

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