The 13th Floor

NORMAL PORN FOR NORMAL PEOPLE is Not Normal at All

Image Credit: iStock/inhauscreative

Time for another helping of creepypasta – myths, legends and other chilling tales from the darkest recesses of the web — and this time you’d better buckle up, because we’re going down our darkest path yet, to examine alleged first-hand accounts of a website that may or may not have once existed: “Normal Porn for Normal People.”

Before you read on, be warned that some of the content I’m about to describe, while not pornographic, is still a bit disturbing. There are no known images captured from the site in question… but rest assured, you wouldn’t want to see them anyway.

The most widely-circulated story about the site came from a frequent user of a popular image-posting forum, who claimed to have received a chain email containing the URL “normalpornfornormalpeople.com,” and an appeal to “pass it on for the good of mankind.” Why any sane person would click a link in a spam email is beyond me, but apparently this person did, and was then directed to a bland-looking site with the title “Normal Porn for Normal People: A Website Dedicated To The Eradication of Abnormal Sexuality,” followed by a bizarre manifesto in broken English. The user discovered that every word in the tract was a link to another page, so he began testing them. The first link led to another plain page filled with more links, which themselves linked to other pages, and so on, further down the rabbit hole.

The user was about to give up when he was presented with a link to download a video file entitled “peanut.avi.” The user clicked the link, and was presented with… a video of a woman in a kitchen making peanut butter sandwiches, which she would repeatedly feed to a waiting dog, all the while blandly chatting with a man nearby. Nothing shocking, pornographic or salacious; just a dog eating sandwiches.

When the user went to an image-sharing forum to comment about his discovery, he found that more than one thread had already been initiated by other users, all of them claiming to have received the same chain email. The user began to browse through their disturbing comments… and found more video links. These were just as bland and uneventful as the peanut butter clip, and mostly involved people being inverviewed in a sterile-looking white room. But the next few clips turned out to be increasingly creepy: “lickedclean.avi” consisted solely of fixed-camera footage showing a man repairing a clothes washer, after which the washer’s owner sneaks back to lick the machine for several minutes; the next clip, “jimbo.avi,” features a performance by an overweight mime, who is later shown sobbing to himself.

Weird, yes… but that’s nothing compared to what comes next.

“dianna.avi” is shot in what appears to be a normal bedroom, with an attractive woman giving a brief introduction to the camera before she begins playing a violin… and in the background, in a corner of the bedroom mirror, you can see the reflection of an obese man in a chicken mask… and he’s apparently masturbating. “tonguetied.avi” features an older woman passionately kissing a department-store mannequin for five minutes. After a smash-cut, the woman is no longer in the video… but there are more mannequins, all looking directly at the camera for another five minutes.

From here on out, the staged sequences not only become more surreal, but there is a distinctly threatening tone to them, and the onscreen “performances” become decidedly more perverse: “stumps.avi” shows a man with no legs frantically attempting to breakdance, while an offscreen male voice screams at him to continue; the same man also appears in “privacy.avi,” but wearing a grotesque mask, watching the violinist from “dianna” masturbate on a mattress… and in the background, a strange creature can be seen darting past the open door. While any of these could simply be interpreted as some form of bizarre performance art, it’s the final video – “useless.avi” – which led the user to believe he was witnessing the product of a true psychopath: a genuine snuff film.

Warning: Sensitive readers might want to skip the next paragraph.

In the 18-minute video, a woman recognizable from one of the white-room interviews is seen bound and gagged on a mattress and clearly terrified, before a masked man in black opens the door to let in a horrific visitor: a shaved chimpanzee, its body covered with scars and painted red. It may be blind as well, as it is sniffing the air tenously. When the abused, feral creature becomes aware of the woman on the bed, it is suddenly overcome with bloodlust, leaping onto the captive and mauling her with its powerful arms and teeth. This goes on for nearly half of the clip’s runtime, until the woman’s agonized screams finally end, presumably with her death. But it’s still not over. The camera keeps rolling as the chimp savagely tears into the corpse, pulling off bits of flesh and frantically eating them.

Horrified, the user returned to the forum to learn where the video might have originated, but was shocked to find that every thread related to the Normal Porn topic had been deleted. When he attempted to initiate a new thread, he was immediately blocked; multiple attempts to contact the anonymous sender of the chain email went unanswered. He also claims that many of the videos, including “useless.avi,” are still available via torrent sites, but while dozens of amateur filmmakers have posted their own interpretations of the mythical videos, so far no one has found the genuine article. That’s probably a good thing.

Legend has it that the videos still reside somewhere in the “Deep Web” (also known as the “Darknet” and other names), where they cannot be accessed by traditional search engines. Perhaps we’ll never know for sure…

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